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THE BLOCK PARTY FROM HELL

Added: Saturday, September 19th 2020 at 11:29am by merchandiser
 
 
 

 

I was STARVING !!! This was absolutely the last block party I was going to attend at a former co-worker and friend of my wife in Hackensack, New Jersey last summer.

. Now we're invited to an end of summer block party next weekend. . I could spend two hours in traffic getting there from our Long Island home. Great.!! Just what I want to do on my day off is sit in traffic and then sit with a bunch of zombies I have no interest in being with. I told my wife that I'm only going if I can bring food and liquor.

Okay-my wife's friend cater to her elderly Jewish parents. I can respect that. They're Kosher-on restricted diets-no problem-but this year put out some other food besides rotten deviled eggs ,cheeses, and salads. I want real food-something I can sink my teeth into. Give me steak, chicken, beef, pork, corned beef-isn't that Kosher enough? My choices shouldn't be limited to baby carrots ,cherry tomatoes, celery, lettuce, and several varieties of unsalted nuts. What am I? a squirrel?

Every other family and friends on the block had platters of cold cuts: humongous heroes filled with sausages, meatballs, turkey, roast beef and veal- even dishes filled with lobster and shrimp. There were grills with hamburgers and hotdogs ,barbecued chicken, and ribs. Beer was flowing out of bottles on every table...except ours !!!

We had borscht,(yucch) and diluted lemonade and iced tea for the little brats that were exploding water balloons all over the table and eating cotton candy from one of the free stands. Hey?? How about a nice porterhouse steak for our table?

Anyway, I told my wife either to get new friends who live on our side of the George Washington Bridge or else I'm bringing some fried chicken and a sausage parmesan hero that I can heat up in her friend's microwave ...for me. AND a 6 pack of Heineken Premium Light . . If my wife hadn't brought Dunkin Donuts and mesquite BBQ potato chips last year, I would have certainly starved.

I'm not going there to stare at low sodium ziti with no sauce and some shrubbery with dressing I'm supposed to think is food. I'm in no way being disrespectful to the elderly Jewish couple but this is not a Passover meal and I'm not Bugs Bunny.!!

User Comments

Porterhouse steak sounds delish. Throw in a filet mignon and a 6 pack of Coors and I'll join you guys!

Sure..  Prime Ribs or Rib Eye steak for me.   How's the weather bayou?  These tropical storms and hurricanes seem to meander to Louisiana. 

My township has dodged a bullet twice but we have a storm off the Texas coast that's giving us fits.  We may get a low Cat 1 hurricane early next week ot it may just go into Texas.  Time will tell what happens.  If anything, we'll have alot of rain but nothing major.

There should have been a nearby Wawa that you could of grabbed a quick snack in. They make a not so bad cheesesteak or meatball parm.  It's only polite to show up with some refreshments. Even if they are for your own consumption. Especially in NJ. 

No Wawa by us in Eastern Queens. I've purchased fro Wawa in Blakeslee, Pa. near where we have a second home in the Poconos. I'd even  bring in 7-11 if it was ok. 

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