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bobbyboxtop

 

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"STEVE P., WE CAN REBUILD HIM !"

Added: Thursday, September 20th 2012 at 4:24am by bobbyboxtop
Category: About Me > About Me
Related Tags: me
 
 
 

Hello, Bloggers!

I am sure there are some of you here who remembers "The Six Million Dollar Man"?

The catchphrase was........"STEVE AUSTIN, WE CAN REBUILD HIM !", or something like that.

Well, take away the "Austin" and replace it with "Steve Picard" (my name), and I am hoping that the same optimistic statement applies.

For, over the past few years, I am slowly coming apart at the seams!

Is this, I wonder, what generally happens when we reach a certain age?

Where was the warning?

I had been a pretty athletic guy up until "the fall".

As some of you may know, I have recently had a prostate operation which has left me with a catheter dangling an inch above my bellybutton, until my "pee pee hole" in my "ticket" works normally again, then it can be removed.

As some of you may also know, last week I had an accident, in a crematorium of all places!

The bench I went to sit on tipped backwards, and I landed flush on my chest onto the bottom of the bench..

No cracked ribs, fortunately, but plenty of painful bruising.

The doc tells me that it'll take around six weeks to heal.

My "saving grace" in this scenario is that I am suing the goddamn corporation who allowed a bench to be planted in a crematorium without first affixing it to the ground !!

I developed my prostate problem in 2004 and, like many men, I left it, hoping it would right itself.

Bad move!      {#basic-frown.gif}

At least it isn't cancer, though, so I have to be grateful for that.

A few years back, I fell onto my right knee and, once again, I left it.

Now, I am walking with a crutch, hopefully temporarily, whilst I begin to go through the process of rehabilitation.

In 2008, I developed a brief bout of "swine flu".

I remember getting up to go to the bathroom one night in February of that year and, lo and behold, I woke up on the hallway floor around 36 hours later!

Man, was I dehydrated !!        {#basic-undecided.gif}

In the same year, according to my doc, I was supposed to have had a nervous breakdown, I guess it was the swine flu that temporarily wrecked my nervous system.

In 1996, a few weeks after I found my father dead, I believe I may have had a small stroke. 

I went numb down one side (could've been delayed shock), and lost part vision in one eye, although my ego is still intact as the eye looks perfect, it is optic nerve damage behind the eye, which affects clarity in that eye. I have to wear sunglasses in brightly-lit places.

In 1974, I was given a year to live unless I had all of my teeth out- what a choice!

I had developed pyorreah of the gums, a kind of blood poisoning which decays all of your teeth.

By the time I had them whipped out, I had lost around ten teeth that had softened and gone rotten.

It's no cakewalk having to wear false teeth, for sure, but considering that my teeth were on the way out, I am far better off as I am now.

It hasn't affected my relationships, including a marriage, and I made damn sure that the "teeth" I purchased looked as genuine as possible, and I have to say that it was worth the money.

Did you know that Mickey Rourke, the actor, has gone through a similar experience?

Hey, this isn't a"poor me" story, and I know that there are many people much worse off than myself.

However, if they are to "rebuild" me, I am hoping that the superglue is powerful enough until I at least check out from this life!       


User Comments

I'm pretty sure you'll be around for a while longer...that superglue works wonders!

...so long as you don't sniff it !!       {#bubble-gum.gif}

I guess when you sum up a list of ailments, we all have similar stories. How do you feel today? This moment? As I get older, I find myself asking these questions. I guess it is normal to some extent. You are correct in saying there are those who are far worse off than you. Some are much younger as well. I think it comes down to how we deal with it that matters. Even though it isn't a pleasant part of life it is one of the things that makes us who we are.

I wonder if when they rebuild you, you will come with that dramatic sound when you move, just like the bionic man. {#crosseyed.gif}

...yes, we are cogs in the machine of Life.

"dramatic sound when you move".

Are you telling me I'm fat, hahaah?!!            {#happy.gif}

No! hahahaha! I would never throw rocks in glass houses. 

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OkxywaZUA7Y

It starts happening to all of us when we start getting in this age bracket, unfortunately.

I would recommend epoxy glue, instead of superglue....hold much better and lasts much longer.

..."epoxy glue"?

Which epoch was that invented?

I know Duct Tape is big in the States.......

Duct Tape is now called Duck Tape and comes in designer colors and patterns. It's a marvelous invention. I don't think it works on prostates though. I could be wrong.

...maybe I can use it to rebuild myself?

Then I would look so visually attractive, and live a designer-style life?      {#cool2.gif}

Duct tape fixes everything...and if it doesn't, you didn't use enough duct tape!

Be careful. It's tricky stuff.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epoxy

It's been around for many decades and you can still buy it.  It comes as two tubes, and you squeeze out equal amounts of each and mix it together.  It's usually stronger than the original item it's used on.

I'm getting there as well. My teeth are getting bad (or is it my gums? Because I can't tell what hurts when it becomes a "tooth ache"), I have ulcerative colitis, and I have scoliosis in my back that has gotten worse lately. I will get at least one week out of 6 months, where I can't stand in one spot too long and the lower back hurts and then have troubles trying to sit down, and I have been smoking since I was 13 years old. Plus, I'm only 41 years old!

But I am pretty sure you will be around for a long time. It will probably take a bit to to get healed up because it seems like you have waited until the last minute to get things taken care of...just like me!

Hope you start feeling some relief soon :(

...thanks, BM, in other way my life is good, so.......

Living hard is a temptation for many when we're younger, it sounds like you and I "lived it up" for at least a decade, so as we get older we have to play the percentages a little.

No regrets, and hopefully you don't have any either.......

Nope, no regrets at all. In fact, my past is what makes me the person that I am today 9which is a good thing in my opinion).

...it's the intricacies of our personalities that give us character, and make us "us"!

Steve, it is just starting--sorry to have to give you the bad news---warning: after 70 you spend most of your time going to and from plus waiting in a doctor's office!

Don't know how old you are but I started falling apart at 62--76 now and, believe it or not, things are getting better--maybe less things to go wrong! :O)

...well, I guess senility helps up to a point.

I often visited my grandma in an Old Folks' Home, and she told me that she was starting to get terribly confused.

I just sat her down and gently told her that she was becoming a little senile, that it was part of Life's pattern, that it was normal.

I think she relaxed more after that......

Not all old folks get senile--I live in a community of people from 62-97 years old--about 300--not a senile one among them but a lot do become drinkers!

They say that when you turn 60, three things become a problem: one, you memory starts to go, two.....uh....I can't remember the other two.

I did get some good guidance for turning 60  from a fella who had "been there done that":  Never pass up the chance for a nap;   Never waste an erection;  AND NEVER trust a fart.

{#rofl.gif}

...no, I realise.

What I was trying to say was that senility is a natural pattern in Life, not necessarily pleasant but one not to be feared.

I am 61.

Oh come on Bobby, you are a kid---60? I don't even remember (see BFD's comment) being 60 it was so long ago! :O)

...that must be your senility taking over, haha!

Among other things!!!!{#rofl.gif} {#rofl.gif} {#rofl.gif}

If I admit to knowing who Steve Austin was   does it make me old?  If so..i never heard of him until you said about him...and......just blame the aches n pains on the weather...we are all softies in comparison to our ancestors...( that's my excuse and am sticking to it lmao) 

...my girlfriend, from the north of England, swears by the old-fashioned remedies that were handed down, our ancestors were more clued-in and tougher, in general.......

The only conclusion I can draw is that you have had so much misfortune to date, that you must now lift your head up high, knowing that surely much better things are just around the corner.

From this moment accentuate the positive and that good fortune which has been long overdue will all be yours.

...good points, AV !

Fortunately, I do not dwell on the Negative.

I have had just as much good fortune as bad - I was married to a beautiful woman, I have some great friends, a gift for creative writing, and am now about to become an author - so it balances out somewhat.

I'm no doctor, but all I can say is "really look after yourself from here on out".  According to the nursing course I was in a couple of years ago, it is never too late to improve your physical condition.  I can see you are taking care of things, but are you also eating healthy, drinking enough water, taking vitamins, etc?  If you smoke, are you going to ditch the habit?  Good luck, bobby!

...sound advice, Lois!

I have been eating quite healthily for some time now, although chocolate is my Achilles Heel.

I hardly touch alcohol these days, gave up smoking "cold turkey" two years ago, although I do need to drink more than a pint of water a day, and perhaps begin taking some vitamins again.......

I guess the rusty bucket of bolts is perpetually falling apart.  Maybe we need to send you one of those Indy racing car pit teams, maybe a welder or two, and have them work on you in a machine shop for  a few days....

...you sort out the bill, I'll await the infiltration, SG..........{#boxing.gif} {#drinking08.gif}

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