So I was discharged from the hospital on Tuesday night.  While I was vomitting.  Wed I saw my surgeon and he had no answers for me.  He said to stay out of work for another week and that possibly the opening to my stomach was constricting.  So he sent me today for a barium swallow.  Since I had my surgery I can only swallow a little bit at a time without getting sick, being in pain, or throwing up.  So now they want me to drink from a straw (which I was told is a big no no).  Not only am I drinking from a straw I am doing it on my belly, flat on my back, and on my right side.  Also I am to take as much in as I can at one time.  I only threw up once in the radiology room so I was impressed with that.  However I recently learned that barium will slowly be leaking from my body for the next 48 hours and I need to be on high alert.  In radiology the doc (who is a giant ass) tells me that everything is going through ok and it looksgood.  *sigh* so what the hell is wrong with me?  My surgeon also told me yesterday that some people take a month to heal totally.  Well a month is next week.  I am hopeful that this might just be my case.  I did so well in the beginning that maybe I pushed myself a little too much.  I am sure that is the case considering they can't find anything else wrong with me.  Yesterday I threw up fierce.  It was a violent throw up which I found very odd because I didn't eat anything and barely drank.  Last night, I had some saltines and the corner of a piece of pizza.  I figured I was going to throw it up anyway.  But here's the kicker.. I didn't throw it up.  Today I have had a belly full of barium and some gatorade.  I am terrified to eat but I have to try.

My current issues are mental.  I am worried because I keep throwing up that something is seriously wrong.  And financially I am in the poor house.  I usually have a lot of money.  Between my job and my tip money I usually have enough money in my pocket to live a comfortable life.  My paycheck tomorrow (2 weeks worth) will be under $80.  If I fill my gas tank I am screwed.  I hate being broke.  There is nothing more depressing then being broke.  They say money doesn't buy happiness but I totally disagree.  I am much more happier with money in my pocket.  I can't do anything on my time off.  I can barely afford to take my daughter to the movies.  And I don't forsee getting my medical leave money anytime soon because my job is being a dick about it.  If I end up losing the money I might just have to sue them.  Because this is bullshit.  I don't care if they are behind in HR.  This is their job andthey know that I only have 30 days to get my paper work in or I get nothing.  30 days is up in 3 days.  I am highly pissed off.

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